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I am generally anti-substitution but it's not a bright-line view. If there's something you're allergic to and the dish will still work without it -- e.g., you want the sesame seeds left off the topping for a crudo -- then go ahead and ask for that. But in general I think you should trust the restaurant's judgment on flavor, and if the thing you're trying to avoid is sufficiently central to the dish, you should just order something else.

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Oh yeah, allergies are an obvious exception. People should absolutely ask to substitute for something they're allergic to.

I agree 100 percent about trusting the restaurant's judgment. So what if it's a combination you haven't seen before? They surely haven't put it on the menu at random -- maybe TRY IT rather than automatically rejecting it.

This is an increasingly big pet peeve of mine. Why go to a restaurant at all if you don't want to see how they make food? Gah!

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